Hey friend. First off, I can’t even begin to express how sorry I am about your mom. I can’t imagine how you’re feeling right now and I’ll keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Secondly, friends can be the worst. I have a lot of friends that are sometimes the worst. People are selfish and people can be cruel when they’re only thinking about themselves. But if it’s not those friends you confide in, I promise that there are other people who care about you and who would be honored that you came to them for help. Lastly, if you’re ever thinking about suicide, here’s some things that have helped me: baths, sleeping on it, Netflix, talking to people, even just about petty things, engaging in hobbies, and you might not be religious, but I pray like, a lot. I was really depressed last semester and I’ve made praying a habit this year and I’m doing significantly better. Anyway, if you seriously ever need someone to talk to, please come off anon and we can talk or skype or whatever you want. I know that suicide can sound appealing in the moment, but a few hours, days, or maybe even weeks later, you’re going to think back on that time and be so relieved that you’re still here. I love you buddy.